Back in October, I wrote this post. The final sentence reads:
In 19 weeks, I’ll be gone and that is a fantastic feeling
Now, those 19 weeks are over. Tomorrow is the big day.
I’m doing what I set out to do – roll the dice.
Leave my pokey house share, finish work, get on a plane and fly away. Far, far away. Specifically, South America.
I was excited when I wrote that post. Now, I’m still excited but also very very nervous. I’m not sure why.
Afraid I won’t like it there? Afraid I won’t make any travel friends en route? Afraid I won’t enjoy the backpacker experience any more?
I think all of these things are probably true to some extent. But I think that’s normal as well.
What I really want to do is enjoy these next for months. Just relax, take the obstacles and problems that inevitably crop up when travelling with a deep breath, and get around them with a smile and a shrug.
A shrug because, really, things matter less when you’re on the road.
It’s all up to me though.
Up to me how I react to these situations. Up to me whether I have the courage to talk to fellow travellers. I’ll be all alone so, as intimidating as it is to go up up to a group of people you don’t know and say hi, it’s do or die.
You either do it or spend your time by yourself.
I’ve been one of the people who has been one of a group and was approached by a solo backpacker and I always always made them feel as welcome as possible.
Because I know how hard it can be for some people to do it and I’d like to think I’ll be given the same treatment.
It’s so strange to think that tomorrow, there will no more boring life that’s driven me to roll my dice, no more annoying and loud housemates, no more tedious job, no more monotony.
My days now will be varied and weird and full of spending money I’ve taken so long to save. My life for the next few months is literally about to be flipped on its head.
All of the things that I were so important to me and occupied my mind so often – girls, dating, money, savings, jobs, career paths, how I never see my friends any more, why I never have Friday night plans, how much my life sucks, how boring my life is – that’s all about to stop. Just like that. Gone.
It still doesn’t feel real. I don’t think it will until I set foot on foreign soil.
What this means for you, dear reader, is that I probably won’t be blogging for a while. I’m sorry to drop that bombshell on you. Be strong at this most difficult of times. Talk to your therapist. Ask your boss for some compassionate leave.
Seriously though, I love writing this blog but without a laptop or a tablet, I just don’t see how I’d manage it.
I have the WordPress app on my phone but my phone is an ancient steaming pile of faecal matter and I certainly don’t have the patience to type out a whole post on it. I also don’t know what the internet situation will be.
But, hey, never say never. I don’t know what awaits. Maybe I’ll hunt down an internet cafe one afternoon because I can’t fight the urge to unburden myself in written format.
This blog is my go-to therapeutic tool and, thinking about it, it’s not beyond the realms of possibility that I’ll drop in from time to time to talk about what’s been happening. (There will be other blogs, it’s not you it’s me, etc.)
I think because this blog documents the time leading up to my decision to travel, then the period between booking the trip and leaving for it, maybe it would be a shame for it not to document at least a little bit of what I’m feeling from time to time.
Maybe I’ll do some really short little posts. Like a sentence or two summing up recent goings on. Something like that.
But we’ll see. No promises.
If I have WiFi from time to time, I’ll still be able to read, like and comment on your blogs. My phone can cope with that!
I suppose I should say that of course I want to have fun and enjoy my trip and meet some cool people and see all the amazing things Latin America has to offer, but what’s also massively important is to stay healthy and safe.
I’m not expecting every day to be a blast, and that’s fine, but if I can remain healthy and safe, that would be terrific.
Without getting too… I don’t know… sentimental about it, thanks for reading and liking and commenting over the past nine months since I started posting.
I’ve come to appreciate it so much more than I ever anticipated.
I love the interaction I get there, I really do. So, yeah, cheers.
And with that, I shall sign off.
Stay cool, you guys.